As May (and national foster care awareness month) come to a close, I wanted to wrap up this little series on “it takes a village” with 10 practical ways to be a village to your local foster families.

1. Jump in!
I know I often have the tendency to think, “If they need help, they will ask!” But honestly, I think sometimes it means more to someone if you just show up and help with a specific need than if you ask first.

2. Make meals.
As someone recently told me, even if you have the time and capacity to make a meal for yourself, there is something special that makes you feel extra loved when someone delivers food. If your love language is food, then this is a perfect way for you to love on your local foster families! Freezer meals are an added bonus!

3. Throw a baby shower.
I had no idea how much of a blessing this would be until a few of our sweet friends and family threw one for us! It made everything seem so real and it helped us to see our village face to face and feel loved. Even if you don’t know what they need specifically, hosting a small party for foster parents with gift cards, books, or diapers and wipes will bless them more than you know!

4. Help look for supplies.
Most of the time, foster parents only learn the specifics of the children being placed with them a few hours before they arrive. It is hard to be prepared for every situation so there are often needs that come up quickly. Be aware of when placements are happening and needs that may arise… and then help your foster families acquire those specifics as soon as possible!

5. Run errands.
Once a family receives a placement, the running gets crazy. Between appointments, parent visits, and any extra therapy or learning opportunities, groceries and other common things like yard work fall to the wayside. Grabbing staples once a week or having a rotating yard work schedule are all great practical ways to get involved.

6. Get CPR training.
Be proactive and available for short term babysitting opportunities by getting your CPR certification. Foster care babysitters are hard to come by… if you are 18 or older and looking for a practical way to help, start here!

7. Offer respite care.
Becoming a respite care provider can provide your local foster families time to breathe and get refreshed every once in a while. Becoming qualified for respite care is slightly more work than babysitting, but it is a huge way to be a village! Contact your local foster families and ask how you can become a respite care provider for them.

8. Be patient and kind… and slow to judge.
It’s easy to look at a parenting situation and think “If it were me I would/wouldn’t…” but when it comes to foster care the state dictates much of the woulds and wouldn’ts and what foster parents really need is for their village to love and care for them without giving extra, un-requested advice.

9. Listen.
When a foster parent asks you for specific help, or asks you to pray, details are rarely necessary. Listen to the information you are given, and be willing to take it at face value. Cases are very sensitive and there are many details that cannot be shared. Be more willing to hug and bring a meal than ask prying questions.

10. Educate yourself and your family.
Xav and I are still learning and with every single new thing we learn, our perspective changes and our hearts open more. Part of being patient with foster families (and kind and gentle) is learning more about the traumas and difficulties the kids in foster care may experience. Educating yourself and your family on these realities may not be loads of fun… but it will allow you to be a proactive and loving village.